12 Pillars of Love

The 12 Principles of Love in Action



In seeking acceptance from others we give our power away. The key to acceptance is ‘non-judgement’.
When we cease self-judgement we set ourselves free.
Observation without judgement give you power.
Acceptance is letting go. Surrender every moment.


To acknowledge is to give recognition. ‘Act with knowledge’ – express with kindness what you know of them. Make known
through word or deed what hasn’t been shared. These words of affirmation tells them you paid attention and validates their worth.


Appreciation is a choice to shift perspective – to look for, and acknowledge the ‘positive’ in each moment, in your day, your life, in nature, in others. Appreciate your self – your values, your truth, your courage. Appreciation is about living life at a higher vibration.


A spontaneous smile, a kind word, a gentle touch. The look in their eye, their presence felt -it’s not what we do, but how we do it.
Speak your truth from the heart, not from by the head.
Conscious intention, given attention, expressed with affection.
All genuine love is given without expectation.


Compassion is the flowering of love.
Go beyond yourself, leave your own life aside, this is not about you. Step into the world of the other. Be curious? – what’s it like to be them? Do you know their pain, their passion, their hope, their fear? Have you walked in their shoes, is their life equal to yours?


Creating and having a common connection. Information plus emotion creates meaningful connection. What do you bring to this conversation – clarity, resentment, or an undeclared agenda?
Speak from your heart, present and authentic. The quality or your communication will declare the quality of your relationships.


L.O.V.E. – listen, observe, verify, empathize. Listening is not a time to interpret, analyze, or reflect on what they say means for you. Step out of your own story. Pay attention and just listen.
In your listening and understanding, you are a witness to their life, and in validating their experience, you validate them.


Bring your awareness to the now. Are you fully present?
Become consciously awareness of your body being here in this moment? Make still your restless mind. Be engaged. Are you paying attention?


Respect for the essence of the person you engage with.
Do you have genuine concern for their emotional needs and vulnerabilities? Without equality, there is not love, but subordination. Put them not on a pedestal or degrade them in any way, but see them simply as your equal.


Support is gentle, it does not take over. It has no need to dominate.
“I shall encourage you in your endeavors and to be true to your own heart. I will champion your best efforts. And if you fall, I will catch you. I will give you a soft landing. I am your best friend and I will back you up. I am your wing man.”


The desire to be understood, is the desire is to be heard, seen and known. It is to be fully recognized. And in being ‘known’, we are complete. We have a witness to our life, and suddenly it all makes sense. Now we can let go, and in letting go, we expand.


Know that what is deepest in your heart has a place in this world. Your feelings and desires are real. They cry out for expression. This world cannot expand without hearing your truth.

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